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Home Columns

Grant Yourself Permission

Chris Dao-anis by Chris Dao-anis
May 19, 2018
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I have heard people say, “I want to share a message. I want to speak on stage. I want to publish an article. I want to write a book. I want to speak a message, spark inspiration and spur action.”

And every time I hear those words, I would say in reply, “That’s beautiful. Go for it!”

But they look at me and say, “Maybe later, but not now.”

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“Maybe later, but not now.” This was so familiar to me. Then it hit me, I was like them. When people tell me, “Go for it!” I would answer, “Maybe later, but not now.” I have been through lots of personal excuses to say this many times in many occasions until I learned to muster the courage, take heart and say otherwise.

That answer (Maybe later, but now now.) may be appropriate at a certain stage but inappropriate at another stage.

When someone invites you to have dinner at 3pm, maybe it’s appropriate to say, “Maybe later, but not now. (Let’s have dinner at 6pm instead.)” When someone asks you to do the work of a Certified Public Accountant but you are not yet certified, maybe it’s appropriate to say, “Maybe later, but not now. (Let me get certified first.)” When someone asks you to run for the office of the President of the Philippines and you are not yet 40 years of age, (together with many other considerations) maybe it’s appropriate to say, “Maybe later, but not now.”

But when someone invites you for breakfast at 8am and you have not eaten yet, maybe you should accept the invitation and say, “Oh sure, thank you!” When someone recommends you for promotion after 40 years in that position, maybe you should accept and say, “Oh sure, that’s severely overdue!” When someone asks you to speak up or rise up to a leadership position because they see your performance and potential, maybe you better consider it and say, “Oh sure, why do you think I can do it? What is required of it? What are the expectations we must consider?”

To most people, like babies and infants, it is appropriate for them to say, “Maybe later, but not now.” But for the most of us, we might be seriously missing out a lot because we still say, “Maybe later, but not now.” even if we know that we are severely overdue to speak up, to rise up, to share what we have, to serve, to lead. To most of us, we were born to do it. To most of us, we have been called to do it. To most of us, we have been prepared to do it. And we are being called persistently and being honed continuously.

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So take heart and take courage. When it is appropriate, and it is often appropriate, say those magic words, “Oh sure, thank you! Oh sure, how can I help? Oh sure, I’m taking the challenge. Oh sure, please help me do so.” And yes, even at times when circumstances merit, you say, “Oh sure, that’s severely overdue.”

My friend: Grant yourself permission to achieve, to perform, to lead, to shine. Grant yourself permission to speak a message, spark inspiration and spur action. Grant yourself permission to be the person you are meant to be.

(Chris Dao-anis, CPA, DTM is a coach, speaker and trainer on public speaking and personal development. His latest book ‘Living Large in the Little Things’ is available at Mt. Cloud Bookshop, Casa Vallejo, Upper Session Road, Baguio City. For talks and trainings, email him at info@chrisdaoanis.com or visit www.chrisdaoanis.com. Like his page at www.fb.com/chrisdaoanis.)

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