Last week, at a seminar for Cordillera Administrative Region (CAR) and Region 1 in advent to the rainy season, participants, males and females, took time as respite from their hectic schedule, engaging in fruitful discussion why many males sport a beard or moustache.
They spiritedly embroiled themselves in debate why many CAR and Region 1 males, who think they’re mucho guapo, camouflage their faces with hair by simply refusing to shave.
They eyed Ah Kong suspiciously, sitting nearby and who was listening to their discussion as Ah happened to be their seminar’s health communications lecturer.
Looking at Ah, they wondered why this barbarian aspires returning to caveman roots by allowing matted hair to grow unhindered over his face.
Truth is, they observed, a face of a monkey or gorilla is downright handsome, as compared to Ah.
Say, readers, don’t you eye Ah’s picture and scratch your heads why in dang tarnation doesn’t this Daily Laborer columnist of Herald Express ever shave?
But to be honest, your question like the seminar participants question is unquestionably brilliant, indeed.
So brilliant it brings to mind a good pal, Daniel Bolhayon, cooperative president of pocket miners at Ucab, Itogon. Upon seeing Ah’s picture in his column, Bolhayon delightedly intoned,”Ah doesn’t shave, mebbeso he’s kuripot (stingy), no? Yes?”
Ah, failing miserably to steal a shaving blade to scrape the whiskers off his despicable face must responsibly answer your genuine questions demanding genuine answers.
So Ah finished his resource work at the seminar then sped off looking for answers, and converging on beard and moustache enthusiasts in CAR and Region 1. He asked them, “Sannamagan why you like hairs sprouting on your faces, eh?”
There’s something disquieting about intrusion of an observer documenting comparatively unsophisticated idiosyncrasies of local gentlemen in CAR and Region 1 who sport beards/ moustache, when in fact, observer Ah is exactly one of them, his face being a mask of dirty and matted beard.
Yet, Ah found delightedly the CAR and Region 1 males agree generally there’s nothing wrong about a beard or moustache. In CAR, many males from Benguet and Ifugao love them.
These bearded gents contemplate the passions of human nature on beards and moustaches, absolutely professing there is nothing to fear from these. They believe they discovered a “passion” theory for their wanting to be bearded.
They say that no doubt, like fine music, contemplation of agreeable beards and moustache are like objects in fine arts and nature which they think they can fully enjoy. And Nature is very indulgent to those who don’t violently contradict her with artificial habits or sullen thoughts.
Why contradict Nature, when by nature man (not woman), is slated to grow a beard/moustache as naturally as trees grow leaves and as surely as birds have wings, they patiently explain to dim-witted Ah.
In a playful, poetic, delightful and offbeat way, they swear being bearded is a portal to a wonderful and alternate reality, an invitation to revisit, with a smile and a wink, their relationship with character, patience and non-conformity.
In short, a man’s face is a canvass of creativity as a man is only as good as his face.
In like manner that a woman’s face is architecture of make-up painted eyebrows, false eyelashes, lipstick, powder, cream, cosmetics, and what have you, the bearded chaps clap in unison.
Then away went Ah, probing the women of their opinion and received conflicting answers. For women, a beard or moustache can be polarizing.
Some find it pleasant, even attractive to them. Others are turned off. Still, others prefer the clean-shaven look, at least the relatively well-established trend or closer to the norm.
On employment, for example, the women state being bearded when appearing for a job can be an automatic “job loser.” No man in his right mind should appear for interview with hair splattered over his face, the women say.
It stands with reason why corporations have added to their “do not hire” list in big capital letters the name of a bearded man pen named Ah Kong and alerted their security guards NEVAH to allow Ah entry in their premises as he resembles a goon. If they let him in, they will be kicked out of their “secu” jobs.
Bearded men are perceived by some women as grouchy, less generous and not caring than their clean-shaven brethren.
Tsk-tsk! But then the bearded gents counter they are caring, comparing themselves to the likes of a caring world Almighty, who, sitting in His throne and stroking his long and flowing white beard is contemplating too, whether for him to shave or not.
Anyhow, as these local “barbasan” (bearded) gentlemen stroke their beards and moustaches, their satisfaction is genuine. For in CAR and Region 1 landscapes, they grow happiness hair on their garden faces without fertilizer.
